{"id":67,"date":"2021-09-27T01:48:28","date_gmt":"2021-09-27T01:48:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/?p=67"},"modified":"2021-12-31T01:17:36","modified_gmt":"2021-12-31T01:17:36","slug":"10","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/?p=67","title":{"rendered":"10"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I believe is so very few things. Things that I am sure of, things that I am unsure of. Things that I would never mention to another friend, but perhaps maybe in the silence of a complete stranger. For a stranger will still judge you, but their opinion makes no difference. They won\u2019t take what you tell them home with them, they won\u2019t carry your thoughts around long after the interaction has occurred. You just speak your mind, as honest as you\u2019d like, and move on. It\u2019s like a confession, but without all of the religious nonsense that is usually associated with the practice. I don\u2019t believe in a god. I don\u2019t believe in some higher power, someone bigger than all of us. In all honestly, we are probably the smallest things out there. More specifically, you were probably one of the smallest things out there. I say were, not because I think the situation is different, but only because I no longer know you. You were small in so many senses of the word. Blinded by your own intelligence and beauty, you closed yourself off from the world. You were pretty around the edges, but you were so ugly on the inside. You told me you loved me but we both know that could never have been. You could never love anyone more than you loved yourself. The odd part, was that I knew the outcome of what was to happen, long before it began. I knew what you were, and what you were going to do. I told myself I wouldn\u2019t succumb to the temptation, but I was much weaker than I had planned. I believe in myself. I believe in myself so much that I told myself I could make it work. However, unlike when speaking to the stranger, I lie to myself. I lie to myself, and I\u2019m so very good at it too. I paint and repaint things over in my mind, making them what I want them to be, better than they were before. I romanticize things over and over, making them better than they ever really were. But no matter how much I lied to myself, I couldn\u2019t deny that we were pressed from different molds. I was never going to be the person you wanted me to be, and I would never want to be the person you wanted me to be. I believe I\u2019m better than that person. I am sure of it.<\/p><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-67","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=67"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":84,"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67\/revisions\/84"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=67"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=67"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/twentybag.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=67"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}